New York Red Bulls are for sale

The New York Red Bulls are for sale, at least according to eBay. As of now, the current bid is at $41.00 so this is a real bargain if you ever wanted to “own” an MLS team.

No, this obvious joke was done as a likely response to the Red Bulls offseason. It started by firing incredibly popular manager Mike Petke. That resulted in reports from fans describing their interactions with the staff as they expressed dissatisfaction. After that, the Red Bulls held a “town hall meeting” for 300 Red Bull season ticket holders which went as expected. And there was also something about a 300 page “vision” from Sporting Director Ali Curtis which has been the subject of justified jokes and ridicule from Red Bull fans.

Anyway, the eBay listing lists the Red Bulls in “as is” condition and there’s free economy shipping. Some other notes in the listing:

– Red Bull Arena is included and in “mint condition.”

– Training facilities and an USL Pro team set to start this year are also included.

– The new owner has to be local so live close to the NYC area and actually care about the team. AKA, no energy drink companies from Europe need apply.

– The listing states, “Comes with the best fans that you will see in MLS, especially the South Ward, for putting up with incompetent foreign owners for such a long time. At no extra cost!” I’m not going to argue that they are or aren’t the best fans in MLS. I’ve been to a few Red Bull games and they’re great so let’s say one of the best.

– The team is a fixer upper. The Red Bulls need center backs and replacements for the retiring Thierry Henry and Tim Cahill, who is likely bound for the United Arab Emirates. Yesterday, reports came out saying they are close to signing former US international Sacha Klejstan after missing out of Jozy Altidore to Toronto.

– Special consideration for those who incorporate the MetroStars days and offer better benefits to fans.

So there you go, bidding ends Tuesday at 10 AM so good luck in “buying” an MLS team. Just have to ignore the actual way of obtaining ownership of an MLS team. Hint, it’s a lot more money.

(eBay/Red Bulls/Empire of Soccer/ProSoccerTalk/Goal)

About Phillip Bupp

News editor for The Comeback and Awful Announcing, highlight consultant for Major League Soccer as well as a freelance writer for hire. Opinions are my own but feel free to agree with them. Follow me on Twitter @phillipbupp

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