The people at Reynolds Kitchens, the company responsible for Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil, parchment paper, bakeware, and sandwich bags (among other products), have shown off their sick sense of humor a week before Thanksgiving.

A section of the company’s website devoted to recipes has apparently been taken over by someone with ties to Frito-Lay, because Reynolds wants you to coat your turkey with Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, Cool Ranch Doritos, or Funyuns this year.

Of course, they provided recipes for these concoctions, which sound like the most disgusting things ever. The recipes can really be boiled down to “crush the snack items and use them to coat the turkey as if they’re breadcrumbs.”

Here’s the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos turkey.

And the Cool Ranch Doritos turkey.

And, of course, the Funyuns turkey.

Imagine dropping a Flamin’ Hot Cheetos turkey on the table in front of grandma next Thursday. She’d probably be confused, and then after you explained this to her, she’d be mortified.

So remember, kids — don’t combine your gaming snacks with Thanksgiving dinner. You’re not going to impress anyone.

[Reynolds Kitchens]

About Joe Lucia

I hate your favorite team. I also sort of hate most of my favorite teams.