If you missed it over the weekend, Bud Light released brand new NFL themed cans for the 2015 season. Cans are made for 28 of the 32 NFL teams (Dallas, Minnesota, Green Bay, and Chicago do not have deals with Bud Light) and each have a specialized slogan:
For Miami Dolphins fans, the meaning is literal. Bud Light says the franchise’s can is “the perfect beer for making tonight like the ’72 season – perfect.” Other messages included: the Bills “shoveling your way to the stadium at least once a year,” the Jaguars “earning your spots,” the Steelers “making tonight ‘immaculate’,” and the Buccaneers “channeling your inner Captain Fear.”
https://youtu.be/pK4Uad1A5SY
Those are fine, but I think that these slogans can hit a little more close to home. Let’s try out a few:
The San Diego Chargers: “Perfect for mapping out those eight road trips a year to Los Angeles.”
The Baltimore Ravens: “Because if you want to run a read option with a quarterback with bad knees, that’s on you.”
The New York Jets: “The beer to drink while you realize you have a friend that owes you $600.”
The Philadelphia Eagles: “When your quarterback’s knees are targeted and you realize your backup quarterbacks are castoffs from the New York Jets.”
The New England Patriots: “Because who hasn’t wanted to destroy their cell phone?”
Washington: “The beer to drink while you’re rooting for the best quarterback in the league … to be traded to Washington.”
The Cleveland Browns: “You’re gonna need a few of these.”
These might need a little more work.
Photo from Anheuser Busch
