Morrison’s is a food chain in Great Britian. All they wanted to do was celebrate the great sport of rugby by selling a rugby themed pizza. Now look, we know that the rugby ball is more of an oblong shape with more rounded tips at the edges. But when Morrison’s arranged the pepperoni on the pizza, the tips were more pointed. Like a football.
But then with the darker cured meat on the inside, it looked less like a football, and more like something else …
Think someone needs to have a word with the Pizza maker at Morrisons! We're no pizza experts but that ain't no 'ball' pic.twitter.com/mKadGdTSS3
— OddBalls (@myoddballs) October 8, 2015
Okay so look: When I was in seventh grade, our science teacher asked us what a female peacock was called. I decided that I was going to be a smart ass and repeat a line from a George Carlin comedy special (yes, I was allowed to watch HBO in my pre-teen years … it explains a lot, I know). I didn’t fully understand why it was funny, but I said it anyway. The boys in the class hailed me as a hero. The girls in the class hated me. The teacher gave me five stupidity stars on the wall, which I think is a record to this day. Then he struggled to hold back his laughter.
The point is this: Now I know better. I know well enough to say that any sophomoric joke I could make right now is going to be awful. And not worth your time. Because I’ve evolved. And I’m going to be mature about this. Let’s just say that this is an unfortunate incident and move on with our lives.
And enjoy eating your pizza. Because that’s what you’re eating. Pizza. Okay?
Photo of rugby player “getting ready to eat pizza” by Clive Rose/Getty Images