Goose Gossage

Goose Gossage continues to act like your old, angry at the world grandpa.

The Hall of Famer and former New York Yankees pitcher, who’s made a recent habit of calling out everything fun with today’s game, will be appearing at an independent league game between the St. Paul Saints and the Joplin Blasters. As a part of a promotion, Gossage will be giving away 1,500 copies of his 2016 Official Baseball Unwritten Rulebook.

Here’s a description, per the Saints website.

“Coming in at more than 200 pages and 4.1” wide and 6.3” high the 2016 Official Baseball Rulebook explains everything from the layout of the field, to equipment that can be used to how a game should be scored.  The 2016 Official Baseball Unwritten Rulebook will be similar in size with fewer pages and, by the end of the night; it will be packed with information that addresses baseball situations that have been hotly debated for decades.  Wondering about the superstition of discussing a no-hitter?  It can be in the book.  What about stealing a base when you’re up 10 runs?  It can be in the book.  What about bunting on a pitcher throwing a no-hitter?  All you have to do is flip open the book, grab a pencil and the answer can appear right before your eyes.”

Yes, Gossage will be handing out an official rulebook about UNWRITTEN rules. That’s about as contradictory as it gets. Gossage has quite literally written about them.

Gossage is also set to throw out the first pitch (a brush back, of course), and will discuss “Jose Bautista, Bryce Harper and sabermetrics.” Woo-boy. Doesn’t that sound like fun?!

It’s a shame the Saints baseball team is giving Gossage a platform to spread his silly opinions, but crazy promotions are a staple of both independent and Minor League Baseball.

His book seems hilarious, and quite fitting for his “yelling at cloud” mindset. If I’m a player in that game, I bat flip every time I get a hit just to piss him off.

[NBC Sports]

About Liam McGuire

Social +Staff writer for The Comeback & Awful Announcing.