The baseball offseason can be a short one for pitchers and catchers, who will be reporting for spring training sooner than you think. The offseason is even shorter when your team makes a deep playoff run that goes all the way to extra innings of Game 7 of the World Series. With time already running short, Cleveland Indians pitcher Trevor Bauer appears to be doing some homework to help him gain an advantage on the mound next season, if only someone would take him seriously.

Bauer took to Twitter to seek help from any chemists who may be following him so he can run some information about some secret tests he is working on this offseason.

What kind of tests would a Major-League pitcher be working on, you ask? Well, Bauer didn’t want to dive into that information too publicly, and once seeing the following private exchange that unfolded, we can see why.

After one responder claimed to earn his Masters a year ago, Bauer DMed him to say he was looking to cook up a formula for a substance that would help him “increase surface tension between two objects.” Basically, he is looking to improve his grip on the baseball without actually cheating.

But the DM conversation did not unfold quite as Bauer planned.

Yep. I’ll bet Bauer regrets seeking the advice of Twitter dot com. If only Walter White was there to answer the call instead.

About Kevin McGuire

Contributor to's College Football Talk, Athlon Sports and The Comeback. Host of the No 2-Minute Warning Podcast on iTunes, Stitcher Radio and iHeart Radio. FWAA member and Philadelphia-area resident.