The Bengals played the Steelers today. The Bengals are bad, while the Steelers are pretty good, so the Steelers won.
That’s some hard-hitting football analysis, so hopefully you’ve managed to keep up so far.
In the middle of the contest, though, Jeremy Hill scored a touchdown for the Bengals, and decided to use that moment to desecrate Pittsburgh’s civic symbol, the Terrible Towel.
Jeremy Hill not a fan of this particular towel. pic.twitter.com/VqyVMR1BXo
— Patrick Claybon (@PatrickClaybon) December 18, 2016
The Terrible Towel is aptly named, as they are objectively terrible, and certainly qualify as towels. Can you imagine how many horrific substances and bodily fluids have been absorbed by Terrible Towels throughout the years? Even if you can imagine that, I wouldn’t recommend doing so, if you have any interest in eating within the next few days.
But, this being sports, and the Terrible Towel being some sort of sacred cloth (Holy Handtowel? Shroud of Tomczak?), some folks had a problem with it. Jeremy Hill, though, responded in the very best way possible:
https://twitter.com/xmasape/status/810604691369447425
Hill deleted the tweet, sadly. It’s a shame, as it really is a fine example of economy of language.
But the Steelers still won, which as any Pittsburgh fan will be only too eager to tell you, is all that matters.
(Just kidding, sick burns matter too.)
[h/t Extra Mustard]
