USA Hockey unveiled their new jerseys for the 2018 Olympic and Paralympic Winter Games, and they were immediately ridiculed on social media. The new uniforms are supposedly the fastest-looking and brightest jerseys that a team representing the USA has ever worn while trying to win the gold.

They also look about as ridiculous as that description.

Interesting. What exactly were they trying to go for here? The main concept in the left and right designs aren’t horrible in the image above, but they are kind of ruined by whatever is going on with the arms.

Is USA Hockey trying to distract — or blind — everyone so we don’t realize the NHL’s best aren’t participating?

Back on that ridiculous fast and bright description: According to USA Hockey, the jerseys are lightweight and have increased ventilation that apparently helps with a player’s overall speed. The comment on brightness refers to different film being used for the crest and numbers.

The flicker film (rather than heavy twill) base for the crest and numbers increase vibrancy and sparkles under arena lights.

Sounds like a bunch of marketing buzzwords.

Let’s take a look at how these were received.

The arms really do look like the goalkeeper jerseys seen in almost every soccer game played in the ’90s.

Ouch.

The idea of creating a lightweight, super bright and colorful jersey isn’t a bad one. The USA color scheme could support something that really pops. Instead, there’s… this. Honestly, why isn’t there any red? Why not embrace the gaudiness and go full steam with something extremely colorful?

Criticism was to be expected considering the climate of the announcement and the bitterness surrounding the fact NHL stars can’t play, but the reaction to these uniforms is probably worse than USA Hockey expected.

About David Rogers

Editor for The Comeback and Contributing Editor for Awful Announcing. Lover of hockey, soccer and all things pop culture.