It’s Friday. There’s a dwindling number of shopping days until Christmas, if that’s something you care about.
I’d count out the days, but that’s too much math for the morning.
Chiefs handle Raiders, take pole position in AFC West
So the AFC West is a really good division, huh? Pretty easily the best division the league, with the Chiefs and Raiders now sitting tied at 10-3 atop the standings, with the Broncos at 8-4 in third place. There’s a real chance this division gets three teams into the AFC playoffs, and deservedly so. Last night’s game turned on a fantastic punt return touchdown:
Yes, yes he is.
SEE YA.That touchdown was followed up by some grade-A taunting from Travis Kelce:
How savage is @tkelce rn?! pic.twitter.com/WlECajiGwO
— NFL (@NFL) December 9, 2016
The Chiefs swept both games against the Oakland this season, giving them the tiebreaker edge with three games remaining. Regardless, both squads look like they could be tough outs in the postseason, although the Chiefs did lose linebacker Derrick Johnson to a ruptured Achilles.
Cardinals sign Dexter Fowler to a massive deal
This is a tough section to write, as Dexter Fowler played two great years in Chicago for two of the most fun teams I’ve ever gotten to watch as a fan. He’s great, and now he heads to St. Louis, for a much-deserved payday.
Fowler's deal expected to be big with stl, as @dgoold said. Unconfirmed, but word is 5 yrs, at least 16M/yr. 80/9M is rumor
— Jon Heyman (@JonHeyman) December 9, 2016
Matt Clapp broke it down nicely last night:
For 2017, Fowler gives the Cardinals their center fielder and another big bat, and the fact they’re essentially taking Fowler away from the Cubs isn’t something that should be ignored either. He figures to add a few wins to St. Louis while also being a win or two better than Albert Almora and Jon Jay figure to combine to be worth in Chicago. Now, the Cardinals are likely going to need a few more players of Dexter Fowler’s caliber if they wish to approach the Cubs in the NL Central standings, but the Wild Card offers an alternative route to the playoffs, and the Cardinals finished just one game out of that race in 2016.
You could also argue that Fowler’s improved defensive positioning this season in Chicago enabled him to excel in center, and that he’s more likely to be that version of himself defensively going forward than what he was earlier in his career.
Fowler was nothing but classy as a Cub, in a variety of ways. I’ll miss his play, of course, but also his adorable daughter:
And stuff like this, when he bought the entire South Bend Cubs a steak dinner during a rehab assignment:
7 run comeback W and a spread like this after? Not a bad Saturday night. Thanks @DexterFowler for the awesome meal! pic.twitter.com/6Q39d24gvK
— Scott Effross (@sefrosty32) July 10, 2016
The fact that it’s the Cardinals is unfortunate, but the guy deserves to cash in. And he did more than his share for the 2016 Cubs, playing like an MVP candidate prior to a hamstring injury, leading off Game 7 of the World Series with a home run, and doing plenty more in between. Hopefully he continues to play well for an organization that’s had a rough go lately, on and off the field:
Important to remember that the Cardinals know Dexter extremely well from his time in Houston. https://t.co/PvhLDgRX0d
— Jay Rigdon (@jayrigdon5) December 9, 2016
(Oh, yeah, remember the time all the way back in June of 2015 a high-level Cardinals employee went to prison for a felony related to hacking an opposing team’s internal database, and then the Cardinals weren’t punished at all in 2015? And then weren’t punished at all in 2016 either?)
Anyway, Fowler’s a really good player, and by all accounts a really good guy. It’s much easier to feel better about him signing a massive deal than it was when, say, Aroldis Chapman signed a similar contract with the Yankees.
Oh, and the hot stove remains hot.
Quick hits
-New Spider-Man trailer alert!
I’m just going to pretend those Andrew Garfield movies never happened. And that Spider-Man 3 never happened. Because once you do that, this becomes the first Spider-Man movie since 2004, and it feels a lot more necessary.
-It’s possible that in the near-future, cell phone calls might be allowed during flights, which is just going to be the worst. You’re already crammed in there way too close to somebody. It’s bad enough on trains for commutes, much less a lengthy flight. (Related, they’re doing wonderful things with noise-canceling headphones these days.)
-Troy Aikman almost came out of retirement to play for the Eagles in 2002, which would have been crazy.
-Willie Taggart savaged Brady Hoke during his introductory press conference.
-Good look at the winners and losers of baseball’s winter meetings.
-Burger King has introduced some sort of ketchup-injected doughnut bun, which no one asked for. Just bring back the Rodeo Cheeseburger, Burger King. Or even it’s cousin, the Extra-Long BBQ Cheeseburger. Please.
-Here’s a dog that personifies (well, if you count a dog as a person) happiness:
Why yes, I do want to play!
-Houston hired Lane Kiffin, which, sure, what could possibly go wrong?
-As more details surrounding Indiana’s firing of Kevin Wilson emerge, it becomes harder to understand why he was given a contract extension after the 2015 season to begin with.
-And also, Art Briles is suing Baylor for various nonsense reasons.
-The New York Daily News can go fuck themselves for how they handled the story of a Jeopardy contestant who died of cancer before her taping could air.
-Conan brought back the Clueless Gamer for Battlefield 1, with special guest Terry Crews:
Fake news headline I wish was real
Letterman Relaxing In Retirement By Prank Calling Leno 24/7
One final glorious moment of procrastination
Guys, check out this dog!
http://i.imgur.com/Ikh99U1.gifv
I love that everyone seems to know the routine and willingly stops to play. What a good dog.