At 1:40 a.m. last Wednesday morning, while you were asleep, Marcus Jerry Stephens was at SunTrust Park trying to make off with a golf cart owned by the Atlanta Braves.

According to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, police had to “physically stop” Stephens, before arresting him on charges of obstruction and felony theft. The AJC reports that Stephens crashed the cart (valued at $4,500) into a pole and began to run before finally being apprehended.

We have to assume there were some mind-altering substances involved here or else we’d have no explanation for what this dude was thinking. If you’re going to get arrested at a baseball park, you might as well just run onto the field during a game so at least your buddies can get a funny video or something. And if you want to steal a golf cart, it’s gotta be easier to take one from a golf course than it is to slip one out of a baseball park.

In case you were wondering, the Braves did play at home the night Stephens was arrested, beating the Giants 6-3 in a game that ended around 10:30 p.m. local time. It’s unclear whether Stephens was at that game and never left or whether he broke into the park after it was over.


About Alex Putterman

Alex is a writer and editor for The Comeback and Awful Announcing. He has written for The Atlantic, VICE Sports,, and more. He is a proud alum of Northwestern University and The Daily Northwestern. You can find him on Twitter @AlexPutterman.