BOSTON, MA – FEBRUARY 22: Loui Eriksson #21 of the Boston Bruins celebrates after scoring against the Columbus Blue Jackets during the third period at TD Garden on February 22, 2016 in Boston, Massachusetts.The Blue Jackets defeat the Bruins 6-4. (Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images)

NHL unrestricted free agency, aka the time period when most general managers will stick knives in their own team by overpaying for marginal players, starts Friday. As has become tradition, the UFA class is thin, but it’s especially so after defensemen Alex Goligoski and Keith Yandle signed with new teams and Steven Stamkos decided Wednesday to return to Tampa Bay.

There is very little in the way of help for teams in free agency this year. It’s like going shopping for turkey, stuffing and cranberry sauce on Thanksgiving Day at 3 p.m.

There are some helpful players out there, make no mistake. But what will they cost? Where will they go? If you think I have the answers to that, you aren’t very smart. But it doesn’t mean I can’t take guesses and have a little fun. Sports are supposed to be fun, so please, enjoy this somewhat educational, mildly entertaining NHL free agency primer.

COLUMBUS, OH - FEBRUARY 16:  Brett Connolly #14 of the Boston Bruins lines up for a face-off during the game against the Columbus Blue Jackets on February 16, 2016 at Nationwide Arena in Columbus, Ohio. Boston defeated Columbus 2-1 in overtime. (Photo by Kirk Irwin/Getty Images)
COLUMBUS, OH – FEBRUARY 16: Brett Connolly #14 of the Boston Bruins lines up for a face-off during the game against the Columbus Blue Jackets on February 16, 2016 at Nationwide Arena in Columbus, Ohio. Boston defeated Columbus 2-1 in overtime. (Photo by Kirk Irwin/Getty Images)

16. Brett Connolly, right wing, Boston Bruins

2015-16: 71 games, 9 goals, 25 points

Why sign him: He’s 24 years old, but it may help to view him as a player coming off his rookie season. He never got a shot in Tampa to play a full season on a top-six line and was bounced around a little bit in Boston too. Connolly was the sixth pick in the 2010 draft and there’s always a chance he can reach that potential or come closer to it than he has in the past, especially considering he’s a young, talented scorer the Bruins are letting walk.

Contract guess: Two years, $3 million

Team guess: Ottawa Senators

15. Patrick Wiercioch, defenseman, Ottawa Senators

2015-16: 52 games, 0 goals, 5 points

Why sign him: At 25 years old, Wiercioch could be a bargain signing for the right analytics-minded team. His numbers cratered last season, but he has been a consistent Corsi-rel player during his career. He was buried behind Erik Karlsson on the power play and anchored to the rest of the Sens’ bad d-men the rest of the time. Plus, his name is fun, as it sort of looks like “weird cock,” and if he’s on your team, you can pretend that’s not the first thing you think when you see Wiercioch.

Contract guess: Two years, $5 million

Team guess: New Jersey Devils

14. Kyle Quincey, defenseman, Detroit Red Wings

2015-16: 47 games, 4 goals, 11 points

Why sign him: He can play 20 minutes per night and may be the perfect example of the average defenseman, although his possession numbers didn’t look very good last season. He will be on some team’s second pairing last season and there’s one team that will see him as an upgrade despite his flaws.

Contract guess: Two years, $8 million

Team guess: Dallas Stars

UNIONDALE, NY - MARCH 10: Matt Martin #17 of the New York Islanders looks on after losing to the New York Rangers 2-1 during a game at the Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum on March 10, 2015 in Uniondale, New York. (Photo by Alex Trautwig/Getty Images)
UNIONDALE, NY – MARCH 10: Matt Martin #17 of the New York Islanders looks on after losing to the New York Rangers 2-1 during a game at the Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum on March 10, 2015 in Uniondale, New York. (Photo by Alex Trautwig/Getty Images)

13. Matt Martin, left wing, New York Islanders

2015-16: 80 games, 10 goals, 19 points

Why sign him: He’s played a fourth-line role with the Islanders but he has the skill and skating ability to play third-line minutes on the right team. He’s physical and dabbles in penalty-killing, but his possession numbers have been something terrible, so if he starts playing stronger competition on a new team, be wary. Based on reports, someone is going to overpay big time.

Contract guess: Four years, $11 million

Team guess: Calgary Flames

12. Teddy Purcell, right wing, Florida Panthers

2015-16: 76 games, 14 goals, 43 points

Why sign him: He hasn’t produced at the same high level since he was removed from a team that allowed him to play with Steven Stamkos and Martin St. Louis, but he’s still a very useful third-line player and even second-line player in the right situation. He has been putting up Andrew Shaw-type numbers in his career so Purcell may get a massive payday.

Contract guess: Three years, $10 million

Team guess: Buffalo Sabres

11. Dan Hamhuis, defenseman, Vancouver Canucks

2015-16: 58 games, 3 goals, 13 points

Why sign him: Look, everyone needs a veteran defenseman and Hamhuis can fill that role for a couple years. His possession numbers have remained positive and steady despite the decline of the Canucks and it’s possible he could be a real upgrade to the right team’s top-four if he can stay healthy.

Contract guess: Three years, $12 million

Team guess: Colorado Avalanche

10. Jason Demers, defenseman, Dallas Stars

2015-16: 62 games, 7 goals, 23 points

Why sign him: It’s not wrong to believe he’s the best available right-handed defenseman on the market. He’s 28 years old and could be capable of playing top-pairing minutes for a long time. His contract may be the one that seems the most mind-blowing this weekend.

Contract guess: Five years, $25 million

Team guess: New Jersey Devils

9. James Reimer, goaltender, San Jose Sharks

2015-16: 40 games, 17-14-7, 2.31 GAA, .922 save percentage

Why sign him: The goaltender market is the wasteland in Mad Max and Reimer is Tom Hardy. He has shown he can be effective in the past as a starter or as part of a time-share and if his brief time in San Jose showed anything, it’s that he may be better than anyone realizes after years on a garbage Maple Leafs team. The problem: No one needs a No. 1 goaltender right now, so unless a trade happens (and it may), there’s no sure thing for him out there, so he may need to bide his time for a year.

Contract guess: Four years, $16 million

Team guess: Anaheim Ducks

8. Troy Brouwer, right wing, St. Louis Blues

2015-16: 82 games, 18 goals, 39 points

Why sign him: He’s durable; he hasn’t missed a game the past three seasons and eight total over the past seven seasons. He’s been a consistent 20-goal, 40-point player over most of his career and in a market like this, teams will be knocking themselves over for his services.

Contract guess: Four years, $21 million

Team guess: Minnesota Wild

7. Frans Nielsen, center, New York Islanders

2015-16: 81 games, 20 goals, 52 points

Why sign him: He’s great third-line center that looks like a second-line center at stretches. He’s a responsible defender and fantastic in shootouts. He’s light version of Jonathan Toews.

Contract guess: Five years, $25 million

Team guess: New York Islanders

6. Brian Campbell, defenseman, Florida Panthers

2015-16: 82 games, 6 goals, 31 points

Why sign him: Even at 37, he’s still playing at a high level in difficult minutes. He is coming off a $57 million contract and wants to play for a winner. Unlike other plays in similar situations in years past, Campbell can be a useful piece, not an anchor around a team’s neck.

Contract guess: One year, $5 million

Team guess: Chicago Blackhawks

5. Milan Lucic, left wing, Los Angeles Kings

2015-16: 81 games, 20 goals, 55 points

Why sign him: He’s big, physical, can get to the net and… look, the Taylor Hall trade on Wednesday just about guarantees that Lucic will sign with the Oilers, so let’s just skip to the end of the most predictable entry on this list.

Contract guess: Six years, $36 million

Team guess: Edmonton Oilers

4. Andrew Ladd, left wing, Chicago Blackhawks

2015-16: 78 games, 25 goals, 46 points

Why sign him: Ladd is one of the players that can be a leading leader who leads, according to people who love to talk about leadership in a locker room. He’s also pretty good at the whole hockey thing and is just about a slam dunk to score between 20 and 30 goals for the next few years.

Contract guess: Five years, $28 million

Team guess: Nashville Predators

3. Kyle Okposo, right wing, New York Islanders

2015-16: 79 games, 22 goals, 64 points

Why sign him: When factoring age and ability, he’s probably the best long-term bet of any right wing on the market, as long as you don’t believe he was a product of playing alongside John Tavares.

Contract guess: Six years, $32 million

Team guess: Detroit Red Wings

2. David Backes, center, St. Louis Blues

2015-16: 79 games, 21 goals, 45 points

Why sign him: Much like many of the forwards on this list, he’s a 20-goal guy that has been through playoff battles. He’s also got the leadership pedigree that teams covet and with the Blues reaching the conference finals this past season, no one can claim he can’t win in the playoffs anymore.

Contract guess: Four years, $20 million

Team guess: St. Louis Blues

1. Loui Eriksson, left wing, Boston Bruins

2015-16: 82 games, 30 goals, 63 points

Why sign him: Thirty goals in free agency is like looking through craigslist and seeing there’s not just a nice couch for sale, but a package that includes a desk, bed, coffee table and refrigerator. Of course, everyone wants those items all at once, so they will be costly. This is a bad analogy. EBay would make more sense. But I’m very tired and this is what you get. In the land of the Stamkos-less, the man with one Eriksson is king.

Contract guess: Six years, $39 million

Team guess: Florida Panthers