RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL – AUGUST 18: Usain Bolt of Jamaica celebrates after crossing the finish line to win the Mens 200m final on Day 13 of the Rio 2016 Olympic Games at the Olympic Stadium on August 18, 2016 in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. (Photo by Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)
OlympicsBy Sean Keeley on

It’s Friday!

Remember that song the girl sang on YouTube? It’s like that.

The curious case of Ryan Lochte & his American swimming buddies gets curiouser.

RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - AUGUST 18: U.S. Olympic swimmers Gunnar Bentz (L) and Jack Conger are mobbed by the media and onlookers while leaving the police station after questioning on August 18, 2016 in Rio de Janiero, Brazil. Ryan Lochte, Gunnar Bentz, Jack Conger and Jimmy Feigen were involved in an altercation at a gas station on Sunday, according to published reports. Bentz and Conger were detained by Brazilian authorities last night while attempting to fly out of Brazil. Their claims of being victims of a late-night robbery are being questioned by police. (Photo by Chris McGrath/Getty Images)
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL – AUGUST 18: U.S. Olympic swimmers Gunnar Bentz (L) and Jack Conger are mobbed by the media and onlookers while leaving the police station after questioning on August 18, 2016 in Rio de Janiero, Brazil. Ryan Lochte, Gunnar Bentz, Jack Conger and Jimmy Feigen were involved in an altercation at a gas station on Sunday, according to published reports. Bentz and Conger were detained by Brazilian authorities last night while attempting to fly out of Brazil. Their claims of being victims of a late-night robbery are being questioned by police. (Photo by Chris McGrath/Getty Images)

Are you calling it  or ? Either way, as weird as it got on Wednesday, it got even weirder on Thursday.

As a refresher, Ryan Lochte and three other American swimmers told reporters that they had been robbed at gunpoint in Brazil. Lochte bailed out of town before the police could speak with him but swimmers Gunnar Bentz and Jack Conger were detained before they could leave the country. Then the security footage was released and, oops, turns out they made the whole story up.

The details changed quite a few times Thursday but we eventually learned that the swimmers vandalized a gas station and then were confronted by security guards who pulled guns on them.  That contradicts the initial statement of the Brazilian police, who said guns were not pointed at the swimmers, when they accused Lochte & Co. of filing a false police report.

Now, Brazilian authorities are considering whether or not to charge Lochte & Jimmy Feigen. Meanwhile, Lochte is safely back in America and doing TV interviews where he lies about what happened and getting ethered by sports media folks.

Who knows what other changes to the story today will bring? Whatever it is, we know it’s going to bring more jokes with it…

https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/766459326709903360

Usain Bolt wins third-consecutive Olympic 200m easily

RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - AUGUST 18: Usain Bolt of Jamaica celebrates after winning the Men's 200m Final on Day 13 of the Rio 2016 Olympic Games at the Olympic Stadium on August 18, 2016 in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. (Photo by Ryan Pierse/Getty Images)
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL – AUGUST 18: Usain Bolt of Jamaica celebrates after winning the Men’s 200m Final on Day 13 of the Rio 2016 Olympic Games at the Olympic Stadium on August 18, 2016 in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. (Photo by Ryan Pierse/Getty Images)

They say the 200M is what determines who truly is the fastest person in the world. Well then, for the third-straight Olympics, that person would be Usain Bolt. Not only that, but he did it with relative ease…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n7aC8uEIt2o

It’s also a fantastic year for Jamaican runners in general. They became the first nation to ever sweep the men’s and women’s 100m and 200m in the same Olympics. That’s got fans like Kendra Hansey’s mom pulling out all the stops to celebrate. And by all the stops, we mean the pot lids.

Quick hits

– Tom Brady cut his thumb, which is officially the worst thing to happen to him this year.

https://twitter.com/lukezim/status/766432906499624961

– Sure its the preseason but RGIII to Terrelle Pryor looks like a pretty good combo from here.

–  The Players Tribune is getting into the movie business. Alas, it’s not Captain: The Derek Jeter Story. Yet.

– Philadelphia Eagles kicker Caleb Sturgis suffered a concussion on Thursday night when he was hit in the head by a punt. Weird.

– Could a pitch clock be coming to MLB? The commish wants one.

– The LSU football team did some good and visited families displaced by the Louisiana floods.

– While everyone was fixated on Ryan Lochte and his band of merry swimmers, Ashton Eaton was over here winning his second straight Olympic decathlon gold medal. He joins Daley Thompson (1980, 1984) and Bob Mathias (1948, 1952) as the only people to ever do that. His 8,893 points also tied the Olympic record set by Roman Sebrle of Czech Republic in 2004.

– Looks like Zendaya will be the latest actress to portray Spider-man love interest Mary Jane Watson until the next time we reboot the series in a few years.

– Key & Peele, eat your heart out…

68kqumg

Fake news headline I wish was real

Ryan Lochte Changes Hair To Brazilian Flag Design, All Is Forgiven

One final glorious moment of procrastination

First, watch this and be terrified.

Then watch this and be TRULY TERRIFIED.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQ8cNwvVpvE

Hell is real.

About Sean Keeley

Along with writing for Awful Announcing and The Comeback, Sean is the Editorial Strategy Director for Comeback Media. Previously, he created the Syracuse blog Troy Nunes Is An Absolute Magician and wrote 'How To Grow An Orange: The Right Way to Brainwash Your Child Into Rooting for Syracuse.' He has also written non-Syracuse-related things for SB Nation, Curbed, and other outlets. He currently lives in Seattle where he is complaining about bagels. Send tips/comments/complaints to sean@thecomeback.com.

View all posts by Sean Keeley