Snatched makes Amy Schumer utterly unlikable and just isn’t that funny

Amy Schumer showed some promise in 2015’s Trainwreck, looking poised to take the next step in her career from stand-up and sketch comedy into movies. And really, that presumably put her in an advantageous position. How many female comedy stars can really carry a movie right now? Melissa McCarthy? Tina Fey and Amy Poehler? Kristen Wiig, maybe?

So it’s probably a testament to Schumer’s popularity and profile that Snatched finished No. 2 at the box office past weekend. Either that, or audiences were so starved for something different from blockbusters like Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 and franchise hopefuls like King Arthur: Legend of the Sword that they went looking for a female-driven comedy which may have had some added appeal on Mother’s Day weekend.

Or maybe people were curious to see Goldie Hawn’s return to the big screen after a 15-year absence. Personally, that held some appeal to me as a child of the 80s who enjoyed her in Private Benjamin and Wildcats. She was still prominent in the 90s with films such as Death Becomes Her and The First Wives Club.

With two stars representing different generations, you can see where this could ideally be something that mothers and daughters could enjoy together at the movies.

As you might have guessed, however, if you’re going to see Snatched because of Goldie Hawn, you’re likely to be disappointed.

Hawn’s role is mostly a supporting one, and she’s fine as Linda Middleton, an overly protective mother who used to be a free spirit in her youth. But divorce and raising two kids made her afraid of everything, keeping the well-being of her children in mind. Linda had her fun and a life her adult children would surely envy, but she was also burned by her marriage and that’s made her content to enjoy simple things and a quiet life.

Being so protective surely resulted in her two children, Emily (Schumer) and Jeffrey (Ike Barinholtz), not really being prepared for adulthood and the real world, becoming incredibly self-centered, and utterly reliant on their mother. (Though that’s much more the case for man-child Jeffrey, who even has a pet name for his mama.) That’s not the story Snatched is interested in telling (as if the title didn’t tip you off), and that probably wouldn’t have inspired the broad comedy this movie aspires to be.

I acknowledge that it’s not fair to knock Snatched for not being the movie I would’ve liked to see, especially when those story possibilities didn’t occur to me until watching the film. I’m saying, however, that such a movie is something I’d be interested in seeing. Unfortunately, what Snatched turns out to be isn’t very appealing either.

At a base level, if you want a female-driven comedy that’s not afraid to be raunchy, you might enjoy Snatched. Schumer certainly deserves credit for being willing to humiliate herself and look bad on screen. I’m not sure there are many other actresses — comedic or otherwise — who would perform the scene in which she cleans herself up in a public bathroom before going out on a date. And maybe, just maybe, Schumer is a bit more believable in such a scene because she’s not afraid of getting embarrassed.

But whether it was a decision by Schumer, director Jonathan Levine (50/50) or writer Katie Dippold (Ghostbusters), Emily just isn’t that likable a character. She’s utterly self-centered, caring far more about taking selfies that show her having a good time (whether she actually is or not) and finding a boyfriend than holding onto a job or creating any sort of identity for herself. That makes it difficult to care whether or not she finds the happiness she seeks. However, the character arc for Emily is getting to a place where we might find her likable and she warrants her mother’s unconditional love.

Ultimately, the biggest problem with Snatched is that it isn’t very funny. Sure, there are plenty of awkward and painful moments that will make you cringe, and you might get some uncomfortable laughs from that. All of us can also relate to an overanxious parent who’s just a bit too involved in your life at the expense of her own and doesn’t know where the line is. (Maybe there’s not a line when it comes to parent and child, even an adult one. But again, this movie isn’t interested in that kind of stuff.)

But most of what passes for funny here can be found in the trailers and clips that have been made available online. There is one sequence which thankfully isn’t available online, but whether or not you think it’s worth the price of admission is up to you. Let’s just say that it involves a tapeworm (be careful what you eat and drink in a third-world country, especially when you venture outside the cushy resort) and that you may want to Google “tapeworm” after watching the scene, something you should just generally avoid. Yet the imagination does result in some laughs and Schumer again deserves credit for physical comedy.

If you don’t like Schumer — and she has faced quite a bit of backlash this year, especially for her recent Netflix stand-up special — Snatched will only feed those feelings. (And if you don’t like Schumer, why are you seeing a movie she stars in to begin with?) But let’s judge her in a better movie, shall we? Stronger comeback material for Hawn would be nice too.