Sometimes, Twitter is good.
On Saturday, non-soccer-loving Americans were introduced to Jizz Hornkamp, a Dutch forward who plays for FC Den Bosch, a team in the Netherlands ‘ First Division (which is the second-highest tier, we know, it’s confusing).
The 22-year-old certainly made his mark on the day. With his side down 3-0, Hornkamp scored a goal at the 52-minute mark and proceeded to rattle off three more goals in the next 34 minutes in order to bring them into a 4-4 tie. Thanks to Hornkamp’s heroics, the game ended in a draw.
3-0 achter bij Excelsior. Uitzichtloze situatie. Maar dan is daar:
⚽️ 52' Jizz Hornkamp 3-1
⚽️ 55' Jizz Hornkamp 3-2
⚽️ 78' Jizz Hornkamp 4-3
⚽️ 86' Jizz Hornkamp 4-4 pic.twitter.com/RN7w3rxyWe— ESPN NL (@ESPNnl) January 30, 2021
However, the one thing we haven’t quite noted just yet is that Jizz Hornkamp’s first name is Jizz. And while some soccer fans certainly noticed at the time that the man’s name also happens to be a slang term for semen, the wider world of sports became much more aware of this fact on Saturday. And as such, the tweets about Jizz came fast and they came hard.
4 – Jizz Hornkamp is the first player to score four goals in an away game in the Dutch Eerste Divisie since Robert Mühren in 2014. Eruption.
— OptaJohan (@OptaJohan) January 30, 2021
Football team Jizz’d on 4 times in half an hour… https://t.co/Hdk37NUC1J
— 𝗝𝗮𝗺𝗲𝘀 (@James_BHAFC) January 30, 2021
https://twitter.com/Adam_J_Tweets/status/1355579496066404358
Jizz Hornkamp sounds like something a character in a Diablo Cody movie yells out when they orgasm
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) January 30, 2021
https://twitter.com/biorhythmist/status/1355567766955204611
Jizz Hornkamp is what I call my bedroom when I'm home alone on a Saturday
— hi im paul (@Paulie_Bell) January 30, 2021
— ¡BUM CHILLUPS AKA SPENCER HALL! (@edsbs) January 30, 2021
Congrats to Jizz Hornkamp on his big day. We’re guessing his name is not pronounced how we’re all thinking it’s pronounced (kinda sounds like maybe it’s “geez”), but that doesn’t really matter for now, does it?
[ESPN NL]
