Quarantine Classics: Gerald McClellan Vs Julian Jackson

There is no boxing thanks to COVID-19 and we might have roving gangs of warboys before pro pugilism returns. So we TQBRers are looking back at the beforetimes. “Context matters” is a thing people say because it just does, everywhere, all the time — which is to say, except for when one is talking about […]

Short Attention Span Classics, Vol. 2: Bernard Hopkins Vs Steve Frank

I have a working theory that the Tiger King thing is a government depopulation program where anyone who watches it has his or her IP address logged and is deemed not only inessential, but completely expendable. Does it seem like a coincidence that it premiered the same week the corona plague washed up on our […]

Short Attention Span Classics, Volume 1: Sechew Powell Vs Cornelius Bundrage I

So you’re trapped indoors without your precious sports to keep you company.  It’s just you, your depression, and the chili-drenched sweatpants that are now permanently grafted onto your legs. The dog ate all the toilet paper and your wife already put a lock on the liquor cabinet. You’ve plowed through all six volumes of Faces […]

Quarantine Classics: Scott Pemberton Vs Omar Sheika

There is no boxing thanks to COVID-19 and we might have roving gangs of warboys before pro pugilism returns. So we TQBRers are looking back at the beforetimes. As I write this, I am age 44. Seventeen years ago, then, doesn’t seem so far back. Yet 2003 seems like a distinctly different time, when viewed […]

Fully Formed: Helenius Wrecks Kownacki

There is a reproductive strategy in some animals called Neoteny. In these animals, larval characteristics are retained by sexually mature adults. One of the best-known examples is the Axolotl, a tiger salamander that lives only in Mexico and retains its larval gills and fully aquatic lifestyle throughout its life because the environment around the lake […]

Garcia Bests Vargas, Ponders Next Big Thing

For more than a year now, the conversation around Mikey Garcia’s prospects at 147 pounds could be summed up with a single theoretical question: skills or size? Even with the relatively recent proliferation of divisions and titles in boxing (not to mention meat-slab-building performance-enhancers), the goalposts can be moved only so far. At some point, […]

Tyson Fury Shocks Deontay Wilder By Knockout

Tyson Fury said he’d score a knockout against Deontay Wilder in the 2nd round, and Wilder, and we, laughed. One round later, it was effectively over; it just took Wilder’s corner five more rounds to end it. Fury won the most significant heavyweight fight in years Saturday night on pay-per-view to become the true heavyweight […]

Tyson Fury Vs Deontay Wilder 2 Roundtable Preview And Prediction

Saturday night at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas, heavyweights Deontay Wilder and Tyson Fury will meet in a rematch televised on an ESPN/Fox joint pay per view. In their first meeting, Fury, recently returned from a two-year layoff, boxed effectively for long stretches before getting caught and dropped in the 12th round. […]

Turning Pro: A British Prospect’s First Steps Into The Professional Ranks

1. The Decision The Holiday Inn, Stratford, London, 21st March 2019 “Go to Tokyo, represent my country, win a medal.” He spent years striving for Olympic glory but now won’t be going. He’s all smiles as he explains the decision, any regrets overtaken by the excitement at what next. Dalton Smith is turning pro. The […]

Gary Russell, Guillermo Rigondeaux Win In Mixed-Results Card

Showtime made a risky decision to headline a doubleheader with A-sides who mainly had in common that they are ultra-talented fighters who routinely disappoint us. Guillermo Rigondeaux is at times virtually unwatchable. Gary Russell Jr. can also rarely be watched, because he fights about once a year — literally so, since 2015. All in all, […]

The Lesson To Be Learned: Yordenis Ugás TKO7 Mike Dallas Jr.

In the winking, cloak-and-dagger-and-big-ass-laser spy classic “Goldfinger,” an unforgettable exchange between Sean Connery and Gert Fröbe sets the template for an iconic cinema franchise and, somewhat oddly, got me thinking about the role of Mike Dallas Jr. in Saturday’s fight with Yordenis Ugas on Fox Sports 1. In the scene, Fröbe’s Auric Goldfinger has captured […]

The 2020 Boxing Survivor Series

I’m on vacation this week which means my brain is too, so today we’re going to do something so pointless it’ll make my usual rambling parade of unfocused dipshittery look like Voltaire on an Adderall bender. First off, let’s get this out of the way right off the hop: I know nothing about contemporary professional […]

Thinning The Hurd: Jarrett Hurd Wins Lifeless UD Over Francisco Santana

Well, we can’t say he didn’t warn us. After a tough decision loss to Julian Williams last May, Jarret Hurd made sweeping changes to his life, both personal and professional. He moved out of his parents’ house, cut off his signature blonde hair, and hired trainer Kay Koroma, professing a desire to get hit less […]

The Essential, Must-Make Fights Of 2020

We’re nearing a month into this bouncing baby of a decade, and as such we’ve seen our share of boxing match-up wish lists for the new year. But let’s think about it slightly differently. If there are just a handful of fights we simply have to see in 2020 — by virtue of the general […]

Best Laid Plans: Jeison Rosario TKO 5 Julian Williams

Redemption arcs are one of mankind’s favorite forms of entertainment. Our daring protagonist has to rebuild after enduring a devastating early setback. We become emotionally attached to their struggle because it fills some deep-seated belief that with a little luck, we too can come back from failure. In boxing, often these two waves of redemption […]

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