All anyone is talking about in hockey is John Scott, NHL All-Star in the AHL. To change things up, let’s focus on a guy that doesn’t get any attention: Sidney Crosby! It’s The Comeback weekly hockey mailbag that’s entirely about Crosby this week!
1. How’s his personality?
@davelozo why is he so boring.
— Devon (@DevonS93) January 18, 2016
Of all the unfair expectations put on high-profile professional athletes, “don’t be boring” could be the most unjust.
Ever meet a person? Ever talk to a person? It’s awful. I’d say 98 out of 100 people that you would meet in a blind taste test would bore the balls clean off you. Think about any time you’ve attended a party or the work function of someone you’re dating and you had to talk to their co-workers. Is it ever not the worst? “Oh, you want to buy a boat but the dock fees aren’t tax deductible and you’re considering adding Torrey Smith because it’s Odell Beckham’s bye week and ZZZZZZZZZZ.”
http://gty.im/501012730
There’s a reason why Big Bang Theory has been on TV for nine years and has nearly 20 million viewers; it’s because most people aren’t very interesting and “haha these guys are nerds” can sustain average people for a decade. There are way more Sidney Crosbys in the world than there are David Bowies. No one should be held to the Bowie Standard of Interesting.
So when it comes to talking about their jobs, why should Crosby be any better than Ted, the guy who works three cubicles over and thinks you want to hear about every at-bat his son had in tee-ball over the weekend? Crosby is fine. He’s normal. He may be secretly weird or funny but he has no reason to reveal his true self when there are cameras around, especially when any time an athlete says something mildly interesting in this day and age it becomes a controversy.
“Sidney Crosby: I wouldn’t want my daughter to appear on The Bachelor”
“Internet: WHY WOULD HE TALK ABOUT THAT STICK TO HOCKEY LET YOUR FICTIONAL DAUGHTER DECIDE FOR HERSELF!!!!”
http://gty.im/499997004
People’s reactions to anything different is why Big Bang will be on TV until your grandchild dies on Mars and Arrested Development only got three seasons.
For every Peyton Manning and Brandon Marshall, people that are naturally engaging and fun, there are 98 Sidney Crosbys. Athletes being boring is a true “athletes are just like us” phenomenon. Embrace it.
2. Why the hate?
@davelozo On a 1 to 10 scale, how much of the criticism surrounding Crosby do you think comes from NBC incessantly marketing him/the Pens?
— Mitchell (@EmptyDubs) January 18, 2016
When the NHL came out of the second lockout, it was all Crosby, all the time. It was an odd marketing choice, considering everything above about him being boring. The NHL is this “earn your place” league yet here was this blah, 18-year-old being splashed all over the place.
Who are the biggest stars in other sports? Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, LeBron James, Bryce Harper. You could probably tap anyone you see in a sports bar on the shoulder and I bet that person would want to punch at least two of those guys in the face. It’s sort of the nature of the business; these guys are great, so they’re always beating teams other people like, so it’s natural to despise them.
Is there Crosby fatigue? I know I felt it about four or five years ago when I was reading my 4,000th Crosby-Ovechkin rivalry story. NBC airing a dozen Penguins game per year doesn’t help.
3. It’s a veg-e-ta-bull.
https://twitter.com/ConAirMcDavid/status/689168072544890880
No idea. But in my quest for a correct or clever answer, I found this story on the Penguins’ web site from when Crosby was drafted in 2005. He was a really boring teen!
Favorite music? “I like pretty much everything.”
Favorite movie? Wedding Crashers and Ladder 49, which is a movie I’m pretty sure only Crosby saw.
Favorite color? Blue!
As for his 18th birthday gift? “I got an iPod. It was cool. I don’t know how I am going to work it because I am not much good with computers.”
“I am not much good with computers” is the type of thing your grandmother would say as you hooked up her DVR.
I’ll guess broccoli though. I bet he loves broccoli.
4. Is a sandwich a sandwich?
@davelozo Do you think Sidney Crosby thinks Hot Dog's are sandwiches?
— zach (@zjlaing) January 18, 2016
Crosby is a smart, thoughtful man.
So he almost definitely knows a hot dog is a sandwich.
5. Why the pro-Russian bias?
@davelozo Crosby having "worst season ever",yet only 4 pts back of league superstar OV. Why are two similar seasons being viewed oppositely?
— HockeyBucketList (@pjdelany2) January 18, 2016
Good question.
I think it has a lot to do with 1) Crosby being more productive over his career than Ovechkin, 2) the Penguins being bad while the Capitals are the best team in the league and 3) Ovechkin has nearly twice as many goals as Crosby.
http://gty.im/87213824
The other part of it too is Ovechkin has been a point-per-game player the past two seasons, so he’s not far off that pace. Crosby had 188 points in 157 games over the past two seasons and may be just now settling into that point-per-game place Ovechkin has occupied. It’s like everyone is sort of adjusting to Crosby’s new norm and they are going through the stages of grief as Crosby’s prime dies before our eyes.
Ovechkin was 28 when his scoring dropped to a point-per-game two years ago; Crosby turned 28 before this season.
http://gty.im/503469624
6. What secret collection of harmless but bizarre objects do you think Sidney Crosby has concealed behind a hidden door in his modest mansion? He seems like the kind of guy who would have a secret collection of harmless but bizarre objects.
Susan
This makes a lot of sense. With some secretive people, you can imagine there being a bondage room and gimp suit beyond a sliding wall in a dark mansion. There’s no way that’s the case with Crosby.
Here are the 10 things he has in his secret room he only shows to the closest of friends.
1. Old-timey gumball machine
2. A freezer full of pre-made meals from PF Changs
3. Two-dozen Hawaiian shirts worn by Tom Selleck on Magnum P.I. (Ed note: WANT.)
4. An astronaut suit
5. A trampoline
6. A ball pit, like the one you’d see at Chuck E. Cheese
7. A Ladder 49 movie poster signed by John Travolta
8. Brendan Fraser
9. A dentist’s chair (because he thinks it’s comfortable)
10. Purple smoking jacket
If I hit on two on two of those items, I demand the FBI hire me as a profiler on a consulting basis.
If you want to be a part of next week’s mailbag, send at tweet to @davelozo.
