Next Sunday (Feb. 4), professional football teams will represent Boston (generally) and Philadelphia in a battle for NFL superiority. The New England Patriots and Philadelphia will play to bring home the Vince Lombardi Trophy as the winners of Super Bowl LII.
But what if the cities were forced to represent themselves? What if the Vince Lombardi Trophy was awarded to whichever team’s city is cooler? Here’s our (tongue-in-cheek) comparison of Boston and Philly. (Winners in bold.)
Philly: The City of Brotherly Love
Baked beans are good, but they don’t stand a chance. Philadelphia is quite literally Greek for brotherly love. William Penn named it that in hopes that anyone living there could worship freely, without the religious persecution he encountered as a Quaker. Pretty sweet.
Boston: 4.6 million
Philly: 6.1 million
Boston’s city population is higher, and it’s a little more dense. So this is a tough call, but that 1.5 million-person gap is too much.
Boston: Average summer high of 75 degrees, average winter low of 28 degrees
Philly: Average summer high of 79 degrees, average winter low of 36 degrees
Boston also gets more rain and nearly twice as much snow.
Boston: Harvard and MIT, Fenway Park and the Freedom Trail
Philly: Also an educational hub, as well as an art hub (murals!), and the original U.S. capital… plus the Liberty Bell
The freakin’ Declaration of Independence was signed in Philly.
Boston: Matt Damon, Mark Wahlberg, Ben Affleck, Conan O’Brien
Philly: Will Smith, Tina Fey, Grace Kelly, Bradley Cooper, Kevin Hart, Pink
Philadelphia actually has a deeper roster of modern-day celebs, while getting a ton of credit for Princess Grace.
Boston: Eliza Dushku
Philly: Amber Rose
— RandomBoard (@Rdm_Board) January 22, 2017
To each his/her own, but I’m the judge and jury here. New England is on the board.
Boston: Clam chowder
Philly Cheesesteak pic.twitter.com/Wx12iMR417
— Land of Food (@landoffacts) January 17, 2018
One is a lot more appealing to the masses than the other.
Boston: Ranked 38th in the United States
Philly: Ranked 32nd
Boston’s large classical music presence isn’t enough to save it against the famously soulful Philadelphia.
Good Will Hunting (1997) pic.twitter.com/3o1XbRxq49
— Movie Poetry (@moviepoets) January 23, 2018
Boston: The Departed, The Fighter, The Town, Good Will Hunting, Mystic River, Spotlight
Philly: Sixth Sense, Philadelphia, Rocky, Silver Linings Playbook
A lot more drama in Boston, with Good Will Hunting providing the icing on the cake. Philly gets some love for TV’s It’s Always Sunny, but Boston had Cheers.
Per capita income
A big edge for Boston, but not enough to complete the comeback.
The final tally
So congratulations, Philadelphia. Even if your Eagles lose next Sunday, you can brag that you’re way cooler than the city that defeated you.