A Wisconsin Man, not to be confused with noted superhero Florida Man, wanted to buy some beer at a local convenience store on Tuesday night. Before he was able to buy the beer, however, he was accidentally locked inside the store’s beer cooler.

Naturally, instead of banging on the door or shouting to let the store’s employees know he was locked in, the man decided to spend the night in the cooler and have a few beers.

Via the Wisconsin Rapids Tribune

The man told police he went to Kwik Trip to buy beer and got locked inside the beer cooler when it was locked at about 11:50 p.m. Tuesday, according to the report. The man said he decided he might as well just stay inside the cooler and drink the beer, the report said. The cooler has a glass door and, if the man had knocked, employees would have heard him and let him out. 

A customer told Kwik Trip employees the man was inside the cooler at about 5:50 a.m. Wednesday. The employees opened the door and the man left without paying for the beer, according to the report. The manager told police the man had drank an 18-ounce bottle of beer and three cans of malt beverage, according to the report. He also had fallen over a stack of 30-can beer packs, breaking three of the cases open.

Beer is awesome and great, as are beer coolers, but I wouldn’t want to spend six hours in one.

I’m actually a bit disappointed in this guy – he didn’t even drink the equivalent of a six pack over those six hours! C’mon man, take advantage of the unfortunate situation you find yourself in! And if you’re going to do that, at least pay for the beer you ended up drinking instead of running away!

The man was eventually issued a citation for retail theft by local police.

[Wisconsin Rapids Tribune]

About Joe Lucia

I'm the managing editor of Awful Announcing and the news editor of The Comeback. I also made The Outside Corner a thing for six seasons.