The Cheat SheetBy Jay Rigdon on

Hey, the NBA playoffs are upon us! The temptation to make a joke about how long the playoffs are is certainly there, but at this point, isn’t that kind of played out?

Yes, they’re lengthy. No, no one really cares about the first round. Yes, it was more interesting when it was three out of five games. But hey, it’s better than the regular season, and there’s normally a game on in the evening. Hard to complain about that!

(Having said all that, yes, they’re still too long. The Finals aren’t until June 1st!)

Russell Westbrook was not happy when asked about his stat line

The Rockets are up 2-0 on the Thunder after a 115-110 win Wednesday night. This came despite Russell Westbrook recording a triple-double (shocker) as well as 51 points.

What did Russ think about his night? Let’s let him answer that question:

“I don’t give a fuck about the line. We lost.”

Now, that’s probably the right answer, but this feels more like a bad process leading to the correct result. Westbrook did indeed record a triple-double, but his 51 points came on 43 shots. That’s not exactly efficient scoring, and the Thunder actually have a few decent players around him. Steven Adams only had three shots!

This entire season has been built around the narrative that the Thunder have to play entirely through Westbrook. One man against the world, etc. But I just don’t see that as entirely accurate. Instead, this is just unfiltered Westbrook, for better or worse. He barely deferred when he had Kevin Durant on his team, after all.

And despite how good he is, a team can’t get very far with just one guy who doesn’t exactly help a team become more than the sum of its parts. But Russ doesn’t think that! He views the question as someone praising his individual effort despite the loss! That may indeed have been the case with this specific question, but still.

Also, good lord, what is he wearing? It’s like he showed a stylist the inside of a Gateway Store (yes, kids, Gateway had the original Apple Store, somehow) and asked for it in something loose.

Other NBA Playoff stuff

OAKLAND, CA – APRIL 19: Stephen Curry pleasing everyone except that one guy on the left sitting courtside much more interested in his food (Photo by Ezra Shaw/Getty Images)

-The Warriors handled the Blazers 110-81 to take a 2-0 lead in that series, despite the absences of Kevin Durant (big deal), Shaun Livingston (medium deal), and Matt Barnes (Matt Barnes-sized deal.) Curry had 19 points to lead a balanced Warrior offense.

-The Wizards held off the Hawks 109-101 to take a 2-0 lead in that series, too. 6 of the 8 first round series are 2-0 at this point, and though one of those features the #8 seed Chicago up on the Celtics (which is hilarious), it’s still a pretty ho-hum opening round thus far.

Quick hits

CHICAGO, IL – APRIL 19: Addison Russell #27 of the Chicago Cubs winning a dang game (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)

-Addison Russell walked it off (and threw in a quality low-key batflip) for the Cubs on Wednesday. It was a no-doubter:

See everyone? They’re fine. Just like I said.

-Gronk crashed a White House press briefing, because at this point, what can’t happen? Also, the turnout for the visit looked much smaller than two years ago.

-Netflix says it won’t chase live sports.

-Phil Simms gets a soft landing on NFL Today, where he’ll at least be far, far more avoidable.

-Here’s former (and, somehow, still, potentially future) USMNT forward Chris Wondolowski doing for his MLS team what he normally does for the national team:

-A look at the ridiculously formal NBA tie-breaking lottery.

-C(learly) B(lind) Bucknor blew another call Wednesday night. It’s one of the worst ones ever. Not kidding.

-The biggest non-sports story of the day? Probably this detailed recounting of a knife fight at the Times Square Olive Garden. It’s riveting.

-Baby otters!!!

-Nintendo may have prematurely canceled production on the NES Classic, but could that be forgiven if rumors are true that they’re developing an SNES Classic for this holiday season? Probably not, no, they’d sell a shit-ton of both of them, but it’s still a cool idea. Include Tecmo Super Bowl, please.

-A tennis match was interrupted via loud love-making from near the stadium.

-Unrelated, Serena Williams announced she’s pregnant.

-This is cool, if you haven’t seen it:

Fun fact: I grew up fifteen minutes from Pierceton. Going to a Cubs game is absolutely that big of a deal for a kid; Wrigley is 3+ hours away.

Kris Bryant is excited, and also a really good dude:

Fake news headline I wish was real

Jim Ross Livens Up Own Burrito Microwaving With Trademark Commentary

One last glorious moment of procrastination

This…this is truly glorious, folks. It also requires audio. Please, enjoy:

About Jay Rigdon

Jay is a columnist at Awful Announcing. He is not a strong swimmer. He is probably talking to a dog in a silly voice at this very moment.

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